My first impression of Mary was someone who was having a tough time with life. She was intelligent and capable but had fallen prey to ‘the little voice in her head’ telling her she wasn’t good enough. At work she felt that no one appreciated her, despite her trying her best. She had often thought about moving on, but was scared. Despite being unhappy she knew she was better off sticking ‘with the devil you know’. Her misery at work started to impact on the rest of her life, and after one particularly miserable weekend she came to me wondering what she could do to get out of her rut.
Mary knew that her problem was a lack of self-esteem but she didn’t know what to do about it. She had read endless blog posts and done lots of magazine quizzes about how to feel better about herself, but none of them made a real difference. She didn’t know how to apply all the good advice in her life. She had spent hours chatting to her friends who were very sympathetic, but they didn’t know what to advise either. She was stuck.
Using my breakthrough technique we were able to get to the root of her problem in a few short sessions, unearthing an incident that had happened when she was at school. Although from the perspective of an adult it was only a minor thing, Mary was amazed at how it had impacted her adult life. “I had no idea, something so simple was still making me feel so bad about myself” she said. I explained that things that happen in our childhoods’ can get ‘stuck’ in our subconscious minds and we forget they’re even there. It’s why it’s so difficult to simply ‘think’ your way out of issues such as poor self-esteem – we need to tackle the underlying cause.
Fortunately Mary was able to generate a breakthrough for herself and was amazed that she gained enough confidence to move jobs. “I thought it was going to be really hard to persuade a new place to take me,” she said with a wry smile, “but I was amazed when they snapped me up! They said I was perfect for the role.” We laughed about that and it’s obvious to me that Mary has gained a new level of self-confidence and self-esteem that has given her a whole new lease of life.
“I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life” she said at our last meeting. “I’m going to recommend you to all my friends!”